Radical Anti-Racist Racism (or "Rarrrrrrr!!!")
Okay, me and a friend of mine, Takiaya, were having this conversation that I wanted to share with other people in the hopes that it may prevent confusion or at least alleviate it a bit. We were talking about the complexity of having white friends who actively identify as anti-racist. This is a very specific phenomenon that happens mostly within communities that consider themselves politically radical. The trials and tribulations of having white friends in more mainstream, less politically radical circles have been addressed by folks like Damali Ayo, the creator of Black People Love Us and author of How To Rent a Negro, and also in this article "For White People: A Quick Guide to Having Black Friends".
I would say that what Ayo and the "For White People" article describe are instances of "liberal racism." In radical circles, we agree on the following premise: We live in a white supremacist society wherein all white people are taught to be racist and all people of color are taught internalized racism. I have existed in scenes & communities where most if not all of the white people I encountered accepted this as a basic truth, but of course accepting that as a truth does not absolve one of their racism or make our experiences as people of color in those communities any less awkward or disappointing.
When I was in my early 20s and moved to Portland, Oregon, that was the first time I encountered large groups of white folks who identified as anti-racist and only in hindsight have I been able to realize how confusing that was for me. The way racism plays out in society keeps changing over time. When racism was considered factual, i.e."people of color are indeed inferior to white people," interpersonal racism was definitely more brutal and destructive but also easier to identify. I grew up with the, "You're different from other black people," "Can I touch your hair," "You're so articulate!" kind of racism. What I encountered on the West Coast was more savvy than that. White people, whether they actually knew real life people of color or not, had at least read their bell hooks, their Malcolm X and maybe even some Patricia Hill Collins, and to some extent they knew what to say and what not to say. In that context, I never experienced being congratulated for not being like other black folks, the way I had when I was younger. The white people I was surrounded with knew better than that. I wanted so desperately as a young black person to feel relief from the experience of racism, but instead, I would be required to decode a whole different style of racism than I'd ever encountered before.
So, here's what to look for when it comes to radical anti-racist racism (rarrrrr!) If a white person is talking about racism with you as if it's something that other white people do, as if they could never identify, something is wrong. If a white person is judging other white people's lack of anti-racist politics, especially in a way that seems like they're trying to prove themselves to you, something is wrong. If you know white people who just talk about race too damn much or fetishize people of color in the realm of dating & romance, something is wrong. If a white person becomes defensive when you speak about your experiences with racism as a person of color and tries to use another form of oppression such as class or gender identity to "top" you, Oppression Olympics style, something is wrong. As far as I've learned through my healthy relationships with my white friends, it's best when race is a non-issue. I am not comfortable having personal friendships with white people in which we frequently end up discussing race or racial politics. If I need to process race, that's what my brown friends are for. If me and a white person are working together in a political or community organizing capacity, perhaps that makes sense, but if we are just friends or dates, it's weird. My best, healthiest friendships with white people are those in which race comes up casually and naturally and they are definitely not looking to me for education or approval.
I don't want anyone stressing out about racism unnecessarily. There is enough of it in the world without you going to look for it. However, it is a psychologically unhealthy state for a person of color to be experiencing racism without also being able to pin point it so that it can somehow be addressed. You just have to use your intuition. If it feels awkward, it's probably because the white person you're talking to is uneasy about race and you can sense it. When I say that racism needs to be a non-issue in my personal relationships with white people, I'm not talking about colorblindness. In my relationships with my white friends, race comes up every so often as an incidental fact of life, not something that we feel we need to process together, and certainly not as something I need to help them process. If a white person can't behave naturally about race & racism around you, they have a weird complex about race. Even if they've read every book by bell hooks. It's a strange world when you find yourself having to decode racism in self-proclaimed anti-racist communities, but this, my friends, is the world we live in.
So, in the end, the question is, "What do you do about your radical anti-racist racist friend/scene/community?" Well, that is up to you. You can keep them around and try to talk about it and work through it because you love them and are willing to do them that favor. You can say, "Fuck it," and retreat into a brown separatist community for a little while or forever, if you have access to it. You can try to work on building relationships with other people of color in geographically separate places so that you have more support, if you are racially isolated. You can write me a letter or an e-mail full of complaints and critiques and I'll hear you out and validate you and assure you that you are not crazy. Because, really, that's the point of this: to help brown kids identify a complicated dynamic that can be difficult to put your finger on in the first place.
I would say that what Ayo and the "For White People" article describe are instances of "liberal racism." In radical circles, we agree on the following premise: We live in a white supremacist society wherein all white people are taught to be racist and all people of color are taught internalized racism. I have existed in scenes & communities where most if not all of the white people I encountered accepted this as a basic truth, but of course accepting that as a truth does not absolve one of their racism or make our experiences as people of color in those communities any less awkward or disappointing.
When I was in my early 20s and moved to Portland, Oregon, that was the first time I encountered large groups of white folks who identified as anti-racist and only in hindsight have I been able to realize how confusing that was for me. The way racism plays out in society keeps changing over time. When racism was considered factual, i.e."people of color are indeed inferior to white people," interpersonal racism was definitely more brutal and destructive but also easier to identify. I grew up with the, "You're different from other black people," "Can I touch your hair," "You're so articulate!" kind of racism. What I encountered on the West Coast was more savvy than that. White people, whether they actually knew real life people of color or not, had at least read their bell hooks, their Malcolm X and maybe even some Patricia Hill Collins, and to some extent they knew what to say and what not to say. In that context, I never experienced being congratulated for not being like other black folks, the way I had when I was younger. The white people I was surrounded with knew better than that. I wanted so desperately as a young black person to feel relief from the experience of racism, but instead, I would be required to decode a whole different style of racism than I'd ever encountered before.
So, in the end, the question is, "What do you do about your radical anti-racist racist friend/scene/community?" Well, that is up to you. You can keep them around and try to talk about it and work through it because you love them and are willing to do them that favor. You can say, "Fuck it," and retreat into a brown separatist community for a little while or forever, if you have access to it. You can try to work on building relationships with other people of color in geographically separate places so that you have more support, if you are racially isolated. You can write me a letter or an e-mail full of complaints and critiques and I'll hear you out and validate you and assure you that you are not crazy. Because, really, that's the point of this: to help brown kids identify a complicated dynamic that can be difficult to put your finger on in the first place.
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